Too Close To Home

Rev. Dr. Wulfgar's Positional Statement on Children

I don’t want to spend this article cluttering it up with images so, I promise you, I’ll only use two but there will be links because the articles linked are important.

In short, I had a bomb dropped on me last night. It left me in a whirlwind of emotions. I talked about this with our Tribe openly and it’s here that I wanted to give a narrative timeline that’s fair and based only on what I have been able to turn up and give you the background on the bomb that was dropped and what led to this statement from me.

I was once part of The Troth. I lasted about five months before I decided it wasn’t for me. I won’t go into detail on that because it’s not important. I left a couple of years ago or so because I found that our Tribe suited me a bit better.

This wasn’t The Troth’s logo when I joined but it seems to be their logo now. Anyway, what led me to The Troth was partially, Diana Paxson’s work. One of our Tribe members reviewed one of her books and faced some backlash from it. Personally, I had no issues with the books that I had read myself. I’d even met Diana at Trothmoot when it was virtual and honestly, the interactions I had with her one on one were pretty great.

After leaving, I didn’t concern myself with what they were doing. I’m seriously live and let live. I’m not going to shout at them or constantly criticize them because it really wouldn’t do anyone any good. Would I recommend joining them? No. Don’t get me wrong there are some pretty top notch people in there but I have many reasons for not recommending them as an organization, of course, your mileage may vary.

That aside, I was informed about something that took place earlier this year concerning Diana but, before we get to that, I need to bring something up from seven years ago, well before my time with them.

This was a positional statement on LGBTQ+ members of the organization and they dismissed memes regarding pedophilia and child-trafficking as “right-wing conspiracy theory.” Basically, you can’t equate the two. Seven years ago, that may have been true but, in recent years, the evidence that child trafficking for extremely nefarious ends has been coming up more and more. YouTube channels have been dedicated to filling the void left behind by the departure of shows like To Catch A Predator. I’m not going to blanket attribute that horrible kind of abuse to an entire group but, like many churches and other groups, there are some pretty scummy people hiding among each and every group and I think it’s unwise to say that because someone is in a “protected group” that it magically shields them from being someone predatory. That’s a complete and total falsehood.

You and I have seen the news lately and they’re littered with stories of those engaging in child porn all the way up to the assaults themselves being given insanely light sentences. Meanwhile, those children have been altered for life in ways that you and I whom have never experienced it will never begin to understand.

What does this have to do with Diana Paxson? We’ll get there, I promise.

Enter Marion Zimmer Bradley and Walter Breen. If one of those names is familiar, it’s because Bradley was a successful author of many fantasy novels. Breen was also a convicted pedophile. The allegations against both Bradley and Breen by their own children are that both took part in some extremely disturbing acts on all of them. They lived in a house called Greenwalls and were friends with Diana who lived in a house called Greyhaven. If you have Netflix, the series Last Chance U’s episode called Greyhaven features statements by Diana pertaining to this series of events.

So what happened? Well, Diana has made both public and private statements that were brought to the attention of the rest of the elders (Diana joined in 1991 and became an elder in 1993, tuck that into your mind for now) that raised some suspicion and definitely caused alarm as they pointed out in their statement on May 7th of this year. The Wild Hunt elaborated on it a bit providing what is allegedly, a direct quote from her public statements. Whatever was said in private is not available so I can’t speak to that, personally.

Three days later, it was announced that Diana sat before the rest of the board, read a prepared statement and left. The board was not able to pose questions and decided, unanimously, to remove her from The Troth entirely.

To be clear, the abuse isn’t necessarily the fault of Diana Paxson. From the information I was able to see, she wasn’t involved. The children were frequent guests in her home because it was close to the school and, going on the information I currently have plus a quote by one of the children on her personal blog, she apparently had no idea such things were going on. As stated in the Vulture article, she also didn’t do or say anything to distance herself from Bradley and Breen. It was her responses and attitudes that she presented both publicly and privately that caused the schism between herself and The Troth. This is the Jerry Sandusky/Joe Paterno thing again. Sandusky was messing with boys, Paterno actually did know but did nothing to turn Sandusky over. In this case, Diana had no idea what was going on until well after the fact but failed to denounce the couple or distance herself from them.

Remember how I mentioned Diana had been an elder since 1993? Do the math here. That means, for thirty years, Diana Paxson has been an elder of that organization. She has either helped shape and implement many of the policies that The Troth currently has in place. She’s no doubt been part of the same boards she’s faced herself when dealing with things members have said or done. She knew exactly what she was in for and the smartest thing she did in the moment was come in, read prepped statement and leave. I think, putting myself in her shoes, she knew there was a futility element involved and that no matter how the questions were answered, there were no right answers and that comes on many levels. Rather than go through all of that, she let them just cut ties with her and went on with things and no doubt, that’s painful as well as disappointing but, yep, it can work out like that.

So there’s the background and I have a personal, positional statement to make on this topic. Not Diana Paxson, specifically, but on children, especially those in the respective families of our own Tribe.

They Are To Be Protected At Any And Every Cost.

Simple as that. Honest, direct, clear language, no ambiguity to it.

Sexually, physically or mentally abusing a child alters them for life and in ways that can reflect the irreparable damage done to them. I have spent a near-decade working around people who have directly done those foul things to children and, though we weren’t really allowed to know why any particular inmate was there, I can tell you that not knowing helped me maintain my professional approach to dealing with them. And, look, eight years a small compound with roughly close to one thousand inmates, the chances I didn’t cross paths with a child abuser are slim to none. Denouncing those who harm children is the easiest thing for me. I don’t care if someone argues “All that person did was look at pictures” my response will always be “How do you think those photos and videos were produced?” Yes, children were harmed and that harm will be with them for the rest of their lives because adults victimized and exploited those children rather than protecting them. None of them have a decent conscience, in my opinion. When I use the word “degenerate” to describe those that harm children in any way, it’s not one I use lightly. That, to me, is what they are and it kills me to know there are human in name only monsters that would do that. I will never be on board with normalizing that. I will never use the term “minor-attracted person” and I will never allow a corruption of language, morals and intellect from someone else to dictate my revulsion at those who engage and those who defend those monsters.

That said, I do take allegations seriously in these matters and yes, I’m willing to let the courts decide but once that guilty verdict is handed down, if sufficient evidence is present, then the courts need to do their due diligence and see to it that those who ruin lives are punished accordingly. That’s not just in Tribal matters but also in my every day life. If it’s someone in my life who does something like that and they’re convicted of it, I’m washing my hands of them completely. Any evidence turned over to me will go to the proper authorities.

While I have my differences with The Troth, I have to say that I think they did handle it properly and, if I’m not mistaken even Diana has gone on record stating that she thinks they handled it correctly. I just don’t think Diana handled things correctly and it’s a mistake that cost her dearly in pagan circles.

My first instinct when I see a kid is to make a funny voice and boop their snoot and that has an agenda; to get them to laugh or otherwise calm down while Mom and Dad do what they need to do. If I can make a kid smile, it doesn’t matter how many people were a solid jerk that day, that kid’s smile sticks with me. To do something that takes that smile off of a child’s face like that, definitely will inform me that me and the other person are not the same. I’ll never be ashamed of erring on the side of caution to protect a child and I’ll never back down from it and, personally, I think our current justice system needs to handle things better. We have a responsibility to our children to ensure that they have everything they will ever need to take over for us once we’re no longer here. We have to lead by example. If we’re not upright, they won’t be either and that has longer-reaching and far more disastrous consequences that transcend left, right, black, white, or any other identity label you care to shove in there.

Final point: If you or someone you know has ever known someone who committed some of these acts, I know that can be rough but the comforting thing is that you don’t have to blame yourself. Don’t beat yourself up with “I should have known” or “If I’d only known” because there may not be a way to know. Once you do, I can understand where it would be difficult or even pretty world-shattering to have to cut that one out of your life but you have to remember that, if you turn them over, you’re saving other children and you’re saving a child they harmed from further harm. It’s the highest of moral actions you can take. It’s okay to not be okay in those instances and, you should know that you can turn to any one of us and talk to us about it in confidence.

The best part? You don’t even have to be a Tribal member for that invitation to come talk to me about it. I’m almost certain that our Tribal Elders will absolutely agree and come on board but I’ll let them speak for themselves on it.

That’s it from me, folks. Out of time and this seems like a good stopping point.

Love you all. Take care of yourselves and each other. Always do what lights you up and, as always…

Shine On,

Rev. Dr. Raven Wulfgar